כי מעט אשר היה לך לפני ויפרץ לרב ויברך ה' אתך לרגלי ועתה מתי אעשה גם אנכי לביתי ... (ל-ל)
The period during which Yaakov lived in Lavan’s house was fraught with friction. Although it begins with a welcoming reception, soon after an agreement is made concerning Yaakov’s marriage to Rachel. Yaakov is deceived by his father-in-law. This phenomenon repeats itself later. When Yaakov wishes to return to the Land of Canaan, Lavan persuades him to agree to another contract regarding the division of property which leads to further tension between them. With the backing of his wives, Yaakov flees from his father-in-law without his knowledge. Rachel saw fit to take her father’s idols with her. Lavan sets out after him. Lavan complains about the manner in which Yaakov left his home and about the disappearance of his idols. An argument develops between them, which heats up further when Lavan fails to find his idols among the belongings of Yaakov’s families. In the end, the two sides reach an agreement and part company. Yaakov maintains his position and an uneasy peace takes hold which remains for the rest of their days. Rather than a war, Yaakov and Lavan retain their peace.
R’ David Ashear shlita relays an incredible story that enlightens us to endure the situation that Hashem puts us in, to recognize that Hashem is in every situation, and to know that it’s there for our very best interest.
A man had a son who was very successful in Torah learning. He was always from the best in his shiur and he was considered a top bochur. When it came time for shidduchim, he was told of a girl with the finest qualities. After further investigation, though, he learned that she was slightly hard of hearing and did not want to pursue the shidduch. The father of the girl told the father of the boy that he would give one million shekel as a dowry for his daughter. The boy’s father really wanted his son to be able to learn with peace of mind, and he did not have the funds to support him. The girl did have sterling middos and was able to hear, albeit with difficulty, so they agreed to go out and, soon enough, the shidduch was finalized.
A couple of months after the wedding, the father of the girl informed the couple that the million shekel that he had given them was actually a loan he had taken out in their names. In essence, he had basically lied to get his daughter married.
The young man obviously had no way of paying back such a debt, especially since he used most of the money to buy an apartment. And he honestly didn’t want to have anything to do with his father-in-law anymore.
He went to R’ Chaim Kanievsky zt”l, to ask him what to do. R’ Chaim told him to overcome his natural inclination and give honor to his father-in-law despite what he did, and he will see that in the end, everything will turn out fine. The boy obediently listened, although he really did not feel like honoring a man who so ruthlessly deceived him. On Yom Kippur, he bought his father-in-law a very special aliyah, and on Simchas Torah, he bought him another one.
This avreich was learning in the Mir Yeshivah together with a chaburah of other Americans like himself. One day, a new bochur arrived in the yeshivah, an only child to his parents, and he was very homesick. He wasn’t happy with his bed, the food was not to his taste, and he wanted to return home. When the avreich found out about the boy’s problems, he tried to give him chizuk. He told him that he was also an only child and that he also had had a difficult time when he had first started out in the yeshivah, but now he loves it. He offered to learn with this boy and be his chavrusa, and the boy accepted.
A few weeks into the winter zman, the new bochur’s father flew on his private jet to Eretz Yisroel to visit his son. While there, the boy told him of how this nice young man saved his entire year and how much he loves the yeshivah because of him. His father was so appreciative that he asked the young man what he could do to help him. The young man, seeing how wealthy his chavrusa’s father was, told him about the million shekel debt and how it had happened.
The wealthy man happily went and paid the debt for him in full. His apartment was now free and clear!
R’ Chaim understood that the secret to bountiful beracha and all kinds of blessing comes when a person goes against his inner inclination and accepts his situation instead of disliking it. By honoring his father-in-law, this avreich merited beracha.