"והיה מחניך קדוש" - Keeping the Jewish Camp Holy (15)
Kol B’isha Ervah: Ladies Singing Together. Previously, we mentioned the halacha that just as the singing voice of one lady is considered ervah, so too, when a number of ladies sing together it is ervah (1). It would prohibit a man from reciting holy words if he is within hearing range and it would certainly be prohibited to purposely listen to a choir of ladies, even electronically.
Men and Ladies Singing Together. Similarly, if one would listen to a choir consisting of men and women singing together, this is also called ervah. The Chasam Sofer ZT”L (2) was once asked about having a choir arrangement with men and women singing together to honor the King of Hungary who was passing through the city of Pressburg. He wrote a long teshuvah (responsa) about it. After an entire paragraph explaining the significance and importance of honoring the King properly, he then rules that such a setup is definitely called ervah and therefore it would not be deemed honorable to the King.
Men Who Sing with Ladies. In such a situation as mentioned above, even if all the men are singing together with the women, they are capable of hearing the ladies’ voices while they are singing and even at the beginning or end of a section, if they don’t start and finish exactly at the same time. This is also felt by the participants, as ladies generally have sweeter, higher-pitched voices than men, and at any given time in the song, one group of voices can overshadow the other, making themselves heard clearly. R’ Yosef Sholom Elyashiv ZT”L rules this way as quoted in a number of seforim (3). This is also apparent from the two minhagim (next paragraph) about families who sing zemiros together, yet refrain from doing so when guests are present, even when everyone is singing altogether.
Families Singing Zemiros Together. It is well known that in certain communities where people are extremely observant, there is a custom that families sing zemiros (men and ladies) together at Shabbos and Yom Tov meals (4). They permit this because logically, people are not aroused by the voices of close relatives. Even though we wrote a few weeks ago that a husband is not permitted to learn out loud if he hears his wife singing, in this situation when a man is singing along with his wife and/or daughters and they are all saying the same words with intention to praise Hashem, it is unlikely that he will be aroused by the voices of the girls or ladies. Note: As far as I know, the original minhag to be lenient was only when there are no guests; only the parents and their children are present. The fact that people have become lenient in this regard, even when others are around, might have no sound basis in this minhag. Likewise, there are many Poskim and communities who would not permit girls or ladies to sing zemiros along with the men, unless it was in a low voice that would not be heard by the men (5).
(1) עיין שבט הלוי ה:קצז:ד (2) שו"ת חתם סופר חו"מ ק"צ (3) הובא במשמרת חיים ה:ג ולבושה של תורה עו:י (4) עיין הליכות שלמה כ:כא (5) רבבות אפרים ב:קכב בשם הגמ"ר משה פיינשטיין זצ"ל
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